Category Archives: Life

Christians are Hypocrites – I Have Proof

4:25. The bold black numbers shifted slowly, rhythmically, ever upwards. 4:37…4:44…4:53. I watched the numbers metamorphosis, mesmerized by their clock-like precision. 5:25. Sighing, I glanced to my left at the large, modern clock, then back at the caller ID screen, … Continue reading

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So Big – A Tale of Gyms and Disillusionment

“Soooo big!” I turned and stared scathingly. “What did you just say?” The jerk grinned, repeating blithely, “You’re sooo big!” I stared daggers at my oblivious brother. “Is that a joke?” Quirking a sardonic eyebrow, he pointed at my little sister, who … Continue reading

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Dramatic Decisions – Move to Europe? Or Cut My Hair?

There comes a point in every woman’s life when she simply needs a change. Revamped geographical scenery is not enough, nor is a complete upheaval of her familiar quirks and habits. Even switching up her favorite restaurant never quite cuts it. Frankly, … Continue reading

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Why My 10 Year Old Sister Doesn’t Believe in the Tooth Fairy

We have never been a completely skeptical family. In fact, half of us err on the side of laughable gullibility. Of course, the other half exists of die-hard skeptics, which makes for an interesting family dynamic. Even something as simple as … Continue reading

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Sweet Sixteen in Heaven

I have a feeling that it’s so much more than I could ever imagine. Different stages of my life have found me imagining it differently. At four, I pictured it all in gold, majestic, awe-inspiring, slightly intimidating. At ten, I … Continue reading

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Why I Won’t Be Turning Over a New Leaf (Gasp.)

Typically, I like to think of January 1st as a brand new era, a crystalline future with no failures clouding the sky. A fresh day with “no mistakes in it”. (At least not yet, as the Miss Staceys always have … Continue reading

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‘Twas the Day After Christmas

The day after Christmas is my day for being slightly melancholy. I think the thought sets in that it’s over, over for another year, a year that will be full of change, perhaps good, perhaps bad, but change all the … Continue reading

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Four Things that Make Me Act 3

There are few things in life that make me totally forget my age – Swedish Fish, an unreal amount of Code Red Mountain Dew with said Swedish Fish, staying up until wee hours of the night, and… The first snowfall. … Continue reading

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The Year the Grinch Lost, and Santa Claus Won

Santa Claus has always been a bit of a controversy in our family. Mom grew up mostly believing in Santa, beathlessly listening for the tap of reindeer hooves on the roof, the freshly-made cookies under the tree, a glass of milk … Continue reading

Posted in Christmas, Humor, Life | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

The Night There Was a Killer in My Basement

There was a killer in my basement. Don’t ask me how I knew – I just did. Call it woman’s intuition, call it whatever you want. But I knew. But for some reason, I went down there anyways. Though an … Continue reading

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